The J Crew: The Keep Joey Out of the Way 3000

Thursday, August 7, 2008

The Keep Joey Out of the Way 3000

If any of you parents have ever watched the show Wow Wow Wubbsy on Nick Jr., you have seen one of the characters build lots of machines--all of which are the __________ 3000. So, J.D. called me to come in the playroom earlier today so he could show me his invention--The Keep Joey Out of the Way 3000. (Any of you who know Joey very well know this is a very necessary invention.)

Note that J.D. is taking a picture of me taking a picture of him and Joey and his invention. (The invention is the banana chairs and rocking chairs attempting to block Joey from touching the T.V.--unfortunately it didn't really work, but we won't tell J.D. because I want him to keep on inventing.)

1 comment:

Meredith said...: Or a "Stop touching me 3000" would be nice too!; August 12, 2008 at 1:23 AM

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Funny Sayings by the Corbett Kids

Whenever someone does something for her, Janalynn (age 22 months), politely says, "Thank you, You're Welcome."
After hearing her brothers ask for a Tootsie Roll, Janalynn (age 17 months), "Unt [translation 'I want'] toots."
Jake (age 5) urgently called for a parent to come upstairs to help him. When Jim got up there, Jake was making a calendar and needed to know, "who has a birthday and who is going to lose a tooth in April."
Jim was meeting me and the kids at Old Navy after work. We were already inside the store looking at stuff, when Jim walked in. As soon as Joey (age 3) saw Dad, he said, "Hi Daddy, what are you doing here?"
Jake, age 4 1/2, "I love to eat chocolate. When I eat chocolate it makes my eyes turn more brown."
After Grandma, who was helping with the laundry, put a pair of Joey's (age 2) pajamas in Jake's (age 4) drawer by mistake, Jake put them on (and they fit) and as he walked down the stairs excitedly stated, "Look, Mom, Joey grew out of these jammies."
When he saw one of our wedding pictures, J.D. (then age 5) asked, "Who is that with Dad?"
When Jake, age 4, saw Daddy coming out of the bathroom with the urine sample in a cup that he was going to give the person who was conducting his life insurance physical, Jake said, "Daddy, I want some of that apple juice."
After Mommy had asked Joey, age 2, the morning before if he wanted square or round (English muffin) toast, the next morning when he asked for toast and Mommy was opening the fridge to get bread, Joey said, "Triangle."
At the dinner table after Joey, age 2, had been pointing at everyone in the family and saying their names, Mommy pointed to Janalynn and said, "Who's this?" and Joey said, "Flower" (since Janalynn's sleeper had flowers on it and Mommy was pointing at one of the flowers). Then when Mommy pointed to Janalynn's head and said, "Who's this?" Joey said, "Head."
J.D., age 6, after coming down to get his blanket for bedtime (Grandma was here helping with the new baby): "What happened to everything? Why is it so clean?"
Conversation overheard between J.D., age 6, and Jake, age 4--J.D.: "Jake, what do you like about your name?" Jake: "I don't know." J.D.: "I like my name because it is short. It only has two letters so it is easy to spell."
While eating his snack at the table, Jake, age 4, "Mom, this is my Jake Club. Only Jakes can come in my Jake Club. Joey, you can't come in my Jake Club."
Conversation between J.D., age 6, and Jake, age 4: Jake, "I can't tell if this colored pencil is skin colored." J.D., "You can ask Heavenly Father, just say a prayer." Jake [arms folded], "Heavenly Father, is this pencil skin colored? [Silence]" J.D., "He didn't answer because your eyes were open." Jake, "I'll try again. [arms folded, eyes closed] Heavenly Father, is this pencil skin colored? [Silence]" J.D., "He said, 'yes.'"
After we picked up J.D. from school and he had a "good behavior" day, Jake, age 4, to J.D.: "Mommy's proud of you and I'm proud of you too."
While pointing to his ears with both hands, Joey, age 20 months: "Eyes."
While talking about dressing up as nativity characters for Christmas, Jake, age 3 1/2, "I want to be a wise man so I can build a house on a rock."
After looking at the box with our Santa and reindeer snowglobe, Jake, age 3 1/2: "Look, there's Santa and his goat!"
Jake, age 3 1/2: "That isn't how you spell 'we,' you spell it W-I-I."
After having a family home evening lesson on the wicked people during Noah's time, Jake, age 3 1/2: "I was in time out earlier because I was wicked."
Daddy: "What is my daddy's name?" J.D., age 5 1/2: (after thinking for a few moments) "Uncle Eric!"
Jake, age 3: "Just put on my shoes, Grandpa. Don't tickle them on."
J.D., age 5: "Daddy, how do people with wheeling chairs go to sleep?" Daddy: "They crawl into bed." J.D.: "I'd like to see that!"
J.D., age 5, "I can't eat this broccoli because I don't know what is going to happen in my mouth."
Conversation between J.D., age 5, and Jake, age 3, at dinner--Jake: "I can't drink my milk because it is too milky." J.D.:"Let me stick my finger in it." Jake: "Don't stick your finger in it, it will get wet."
"Daddy, you need to ask about Aflac at work." -- J.D., age 5
Conversation between J.D., age 5, and Jake, age 3, while looking at a toy catalog--J.D.: "I can't get that Dora Mermaid toy because I'm not a girl." Jake: "I want that Dora mermaid toy." J.D.: "You can't get it because you aren't a girl." Jake: "Mommy can get it, she's a girl." J.D.: "Mommy can't get it, it's only for kids. But if we have a baby girl sister we can get it for her."
J.D., age 5, "Daddy, what's car insurance?" [Daddy explains]. J.D.: "Okay thanks, I just heard about it on T.V. and wondered what it was."
Daddy: "Where did we get these three little boys?" J.D., age 5: "Heaven, then tummy."
"Mommy, I just don't like being alone. When Mommy or Daddy or a babysitter or a nanny is near, it cheers me up." -- J.D., age 5
"I'll pretend I'm a burger and you eat me!" -- Jake, age 3
When asked where his Daddy learned Spanish--"He learned it in the middle of nowhere.' -- J.D., age 5
"I'm be carefuling." -- Jake, age 3
After Mommy forgot to get him a drink. "I think you forgot to eat the food that helps you remember things. I heard of it on the computer." -- J.D., age 5
"This toy comes with accessories." -- J.D., age 5
After watching Mommy get blood drawn at the doctor, "Mommy, you were really good, good job." -- Jake, age 3
Mommy, "Jake, you stayed dry [in his pull-up] last night, great job!" Jake, age 3: "That is fantastic!"
"You [Planet Heroes toy] can't come in with us [Cars movie toys] because you aren't Disney, you are Fisher Price." -- J.D., age 5
Short conversation with Jake, age 3-- Mommy: "Jake, please start buckling your seat belt." One or two minutes pass without Jake complying while Mommy buckles Joey. Mommy: "Jake, please start buckling your seatbelt." Jake (still just sitting there): "Mommy, are you happy?" Mommy: "No, Jake, I'm not happy because you are not doing what I ask you to do." Jake: "Mommy, are you happy?" Mommy (while buckling Jake's seatbelt): "No, Jake, I just told you I am not happy because you did not buckle your seatbelt like I told you." Jake: "Mommy, are you happy?"
After asking Mommy to blow a bubble with her bubble gum and watching her do it--"Mommy, can I eat your bubble for breakfast?" -- Jake, age 3
"I can't go outside and play because I need to do my homework. Mommy, can you make up some homework for me?" -- J.D., age 5
"My teacher told me I don't have school tomorrow because it is Super Looper King day." (meaning Martin Luther King day). --J.D., age 5
"Grandpa has a mussmash, just like Mr. Potato Head." --Jake, age 2 1/2
"Mommy, we like Daddy better than you (while trying to explain to Mommy that he would prefer Daddy to do the bedtime routine)." -- J.D., age 5
"Daddy, I don't want you to dash me into the snow." -- J.D., age 5